Love yourself, no matter what
Loving myself the way I am, with all my imperfections, has always been the foundation of my confidence. Well, this confidence has definitely been tested and challenged severely through the breast cancer experience and the double breast amputations.
“Inner-beauty counts” is said so easily, so quickly ..... and I have learnt that it's actually true: outer appearance is totally over-rated. After the cancer operations, my insecure "me" expected that everyone would see my bodily imperfections while my real "me" experienced that people reacted to my smile, my positive aura, .... and that the personality that shines through makes the difference if you think someone attractive, interesting, and appealing.
It might also help you to consider: No one is perfect anyway. Everyone has imperfections in the one or the other way. Once you are able to accept your imperfections in all their scope and dimension, you realise that the imperfections actually make you amazingly unique and then you are able to love yourself wholeheartedly, no matter what.
Losing both breasts to breast cancer was a shock and traumatized me for quite some time but I accepted the breast amputations right away as the key remedy to reduce the risk of the cancer returning, and I consciously worked on accepting my new body shape. In the following weeks and months, my wardrobe underwent a total change-over, adapting my clothes to my new silhouette. Sometimes it was really tough being in the store and looking at myself in the mirror. And I remember that in one instance, I told my daughter that I really struggled with insecurity and her response was, “We all do, mum, we are all insecure.” Oh, yes, so true. Moreover I reminded myself that my body was not perfect before the breast cancer anyway, so now it was simply a little bit more imperfect. And from then onwards, whenever I felt insecure, I reminded myself of this Aha!-moment in-store. For many months I continued to be very body-conscious and felt insecure at times. But this insecurity did not result in me hiding at home or hinder me to go to the swimming pool for aqua-gymnastics.
Now, 2 years after the breast amputations, I have reached a very high acceptance level with regards to my bodily imperfections. And I admit: sometimes a wave of pride washes over me, acknowledging that I have mastered this body challenge so well, feeling comfortable in my own body again. Last but not least: a HUGE thank you goes to my dear husband who has always been the strongest supporter possible.
